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Mom Bag

You feel crushed beneath its weight. You are carrying the weight of it on your shoulders. You and only you must carry it and no one ever ever helps… I am talking about your “mom-bag”!

First of all why do we carry all these things? We think we need to buy a bag to accommodate all of our “stuff”, but we are just buying a larger vessel for more “stuff”. What is in there? I have included a list of it's contents, no mom shaming, remember we are in this together.

So what's in this thing?... Ok, so we have

  • Wallet with 5 important cards and like 14 thousand club or perks cards

  • Ten pounds of needless receipts, for things like gas and Chick-fil-A and groceries. I can't return these things so why do I keep these?!

  • A sunglasses case

  • Perfume, and somehow I still feel like I stink

  • Backup battery or rocket something (I really don't know what it is called)

  • Placemats, like 7 and we have never used one

  • Altoids tin, containing 4 full crayons and one half crayon. Also, 3 marbles, because marbles are super entertaining

  • A comb, however me and the little look like we have never brushed our hair

  • A few pens, and I don't think any of them work

  • Change, 12 lbs of change. I don't know how this happens because I never have cash, so where does it come from?!

  • An apple, it only has one or two bites taken out

  • Chapstick

  • Lipstick, which I put on before I leave the house and never re apply, so carrying it is pointless.

  • A planner, yes a full size 8.5x11 planner.

  • 3 hair bows and 2 bobby pins

  • Half of a granola bar, it is probably 3 months old, so no one will eat it but I am just going to keep it safe for a few more months in this black hole of a bag

  • A water bottle, which is big enough to hold enough water to save a whole village from dehydration

  • A parking receipt, from last week

  • A few band-aid wrappers, empty of course so not to be helpful or prepared for anything

  • A few stickers with no sticky so basically just paper pieces with barely recognisable pictures on them

  • One napkin, yeah I am sure one will be enough, yeah right. For real though, I thought there was like 47 in here, where did they go?


  • A Chick-fil-A mailer for chicken minis!

My point is… why?! Why do we carry all of this? Because we are the ones thinking about every situation and the outcomes of every situation. I am looking forward to the day when all I need is a credit card and lipstick, keys and my phone. But for now I am enjoying being Mary Poppins, well a worst dressed, not put together, can't carry a tune in a bucket, way less perky Mary Poppins.

Now it's your turn, let me see you mom bag!

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